One Cut Away
by The Heart's Notebook
Summary: She has been trapped with him watching her every move for as long as she can remember. She can't escape the fate to which she has been resigned. There is only one way out of the pain she is chained to. This fanfic has no ties to Hidden Behind the Blue. WARNING: Contains abuse.


_**One Cut Away**_

I never knew my mother and I've never known my father's affection. He always scowled at me, not once had he smiled at me since. He never delivered me an affectionate caress either. I concluded that my father hated me. Either it was because I was a half-breed or because he blamed me for my mother's death or hell maybe it was both.

I sat in one of the many huge corridors sharping the blade of my Zanpaku-to. I looked up when I sensed his Spiritual Pressure and smelt his spicy scent. I smiled when I looked up to see him, "Good morning Grimmjow-sama." I had never called him 'daddy' in my life except when I was a child. I know he didn't like me calling him that.

He frowned at me, "Hmph," He walked on and left the corridor. My smile faded. I saw the blade of my sword cast a reflection of the sadness in my light blue eyes. I knew no matter what I did he would never love me. Daddy simply adored Mama, though he would never admit it aloud.

I sighed, I sheathed my Zanpaku-to, got up, and went to my room. I saw him at the far side of the room looking at me emotionlessly. "Is there something you want to talk to me about, Grimmjow-sama?"

"What were you doing sneaking off last night?" Grimmjow snarled.

"I…" I opened my mouth to answer then went silent. "I was just going out for a walk Grimmjow-sama," I replied, "I didn't go too far."

"You weren't supposed to go anywhere at all damn it!" Daddy roared.

"I-I'm sorry." I said. Daddy looked away then inhaled deeply and exhaled.

He walked past me, "You better not leave Las Noches again." He told me then left the room. I made sure that he was gone before I rolled up my sleeves. I couldn't risk him seeing them, risk him seeing my scars. Some were deep, some were light, some were jagged, and some were straight. I inspected my newest cut from this morning. It was now starting to scab over. It would be a scar by tomorrow. I exhaled a shaky sigh and went into my bathroom. I closed the door then locked myself in. I pulled out my hidden blade, which was tucked away in my boot, and took off my shirt then rolled up my pants' legs. I held the blade to my calf muscle… I just want the pain to go away…

##############

I woke up the next morning on the bathroom rug just like after each episode. There was dried blood all over my legs and arms. I tried to stand only to fall back down the floor. I hissed when one of the deep cuts popped open, the scab was new and thin. I looked at my watch and paled a little. I was late for training with Papa, again.

I made sure that my arms' cuts were completely covered and then I took a deep breath. I entered the room quietly. "You're late," He said lowly with his back to me. Grimmjow was sitting and was sharping Pantera's blade.

"I know, I'm sorry," I rubbed my arm, the itching of a scab driving me crazy.

"Is that the only two words you know? 'I'm sorry'?" Daddy snarled, slamming Pantera's into its sheath, and stood and looked at me with furious eyes.

I resisted the urge to flinch at his tone. I shook my head, "No sir." "Shit," I thought when I realized that I accidently scratched away one of the scabs off of one my deep cuts and it was now bleeding through my sleeve. I grabbed unto my arm and applied pressure while I tried to be inconspicuous about it.

But it was too late, Daddy had already seen. He came toward to me. I averted my eyes. I stiffened when he stopped right in front of me. "Give me your arm," He told me holding out his hand for me to place my wrist. "Now," He said with clinched teeth.

I didn't want to but I was cornered. I gave him my wrist. Daddy stretched out my arm then pushed up my sleeve. My breath caught when I felt his grip tighten on my wrist and heard him growl gutturally. My arm stiffened in his grasp. I was expecting the blow any second. I knew if I looked at him that would set him off, the blow would come. He took my other arm, holding both of my wrists in one hand, and pushed the sleeve up.

"Who did this to you?" He asked instead of hitting me. I was surprised that he even cared to ask. "Answer me girl!" He seethed.

I didn't look at him, "You did…" I pulled my arms free and ran out of the room. If I was going to cry I was definitely not going to cry in front of him. I ran into my room and into my bathroom. There was no point in locking the door, he would just break the door down and it would only make him angrier. I curled up into a ball with my back up against the wall opposite of the doorway. I buried my face against my arms. The blood smeared against my face.

I felt him coming without even trying. I could sense his Spiritual Pressure coming down the hall. I curled up into a tighter ball. My tears ran into the gashes, slightly easing their pain, but not my heart's.

I jumped a little when the door to my bedroom opened. I froze stone-still when the bathroom door opened and the light from the bedroom poured into the pitch black bathroom like a spotlight. I felt his eyes on me for what seemed like forever. I was in for it now. He was going to slap me, I know he was.

I swallowed then slowly looked up at him. I jumped when he grabbed my arm a little too firmly and dragged me to my feet, "I didn't tell you that you could leave, did I?" He growled.

"No Grimmjow-sama," I shook my head not looking at him.

"So why the hell did you?" He shook me a little. "HUH?" When I didn't answer he threw me, not literally, away from him. He sneered at me.

I backed up into the corner with fear in my eyes when he came towards me. I was afraid of my own father. "Daddy…!" I squealed. My hand flew over my mouth when I realized what I just said. I started to shudder. I jumped when an open hand slammed against my cheek and left a red spot and searing pain on my flesh. I pressed the back of my hand against my wounded cheek.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME THAT!" He roared.

I flinched, "I didn't mean to…" "If you didn't want me then you shouldn't have knocked up Mama!" I shouted at him.

He slapped my other cheek, "SHUT YOUR MOUTH! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE YELLING AT ME? HUH?"

"I'm just a pest for you to slap around. I'm nothing to you. You don't think of me as what I am, your daughter." I answered. I had to bite my tongue to keep from shedding tears.

He slapped me again. "You're damn right I don't. Because of you she died. She died giving birth to you. YOU KILLED HER!"

"You don't think I know that? If you hate me so much then why don't you just kill me?"

"That would be too easy. YOU DESERVED TO BE PUNISHED FOR WHAT YOU DID TO HER! YOU TOOK HER FROM ME!"

"You don't have to abuse me; living with the fact that she's dead because of me and the fact that my only parent has never and never will love me is torture enough." I was crying at this point. I couldn't take it anymore. He silently glared at me. "Please Grimmjow-sama, don't hit me anymore…" My cheeks were throbbing now. My tears couldn't ease the pain.

He grabbed me by the throat and hauled me off my feet and slammed me against the wall, "Quit your damn blubbering."

I clutched his wrist trying to pry his hand away. I couldn't breathe. "Please…" I choked out. I was seeing spots now and feeling lightheaded. He let go and let me fall to my knees before him.

He kneeled down and grabbed my chin and made me look at him. I panted as his nails dug into my skin. I was shaking. He raised his hand again. "No more, please," I begged, "Please…"

I looked at him when the blow didn't come. "Never call me that again. Do you understand me?" He snarled.

"Yes sir," I nodded. He let me go and left me alone in the room. He slammed my bedroom door closed.

I just sat there and panted. I released a breath that I didn't even realize I was holding. I thought for sure he was going to beat me but he didn't. He hardly ever hit me but when he did he was relentless. One time he beat me so much I was black and blue all over. The majority of the time it was just a few slaps to the face and punches to the arms. He left bruise, cuts, and even scars on my delicate porcelain flesh.

I reached into the cabinet and pulled out my dagger. I took a deep breath and plunged it deep into my heart. I fell to the floor. Blood pooled around me. Darkness consumed me as I laid there crying.

_**FIN**_

_**I've never made Grimmjow act the way he does the majority of this particular one-shot. This is the last time I'll do this. **_


End file.
